“Oh I’m the happiest Christmas tree…”

11 12 2009

“…ho ho ho, hee hee hee – who came up with these lyrics, can somebody tell me?”

I hope you all sang that intro bit to the rhythm of that happiest Christmas tree song, because that’s what I was kind of hoping would happen.

Have any of you ever stopped to wonder where any of these lyrics came from? To think about who would sit down and write things like “Frosty the snowman, happy happy snowman, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha”, et cetera? Why are these Christmassy things always happy? I think Frosty was smoking his corncob pipe, while that happy little Christmas tree got high on the fumes of the aerosol can of spray-on snow. For real.

Don’t get me wrong. I love Christmas music, I truly and honestly do, even though I once complained in a blog entry about how everything Christmassy starts earlier with each passing year. To quote myself: “It kind of makes me want to load all my Christmas music (and the vast collection in my mother’s CD rack) onto my laptop, then to connect my laptop to the largest set of speakers I can find, and ultimately blaring it out for all the world to hear while I bang my head repeatedly against large, pointy – or metal – pain-inducing objects” (5 November 2009). Then again, if one can avoid the shopping malls, and also not turn your radio on, Christmas music can become rather pleasing and welcome when played within the comfort of your own home.

And I do believe that now is a reasonable time to start listening to Christmas music. It is the 11th of December, after all. In two weeks’ time, all the fuss will be – almost – over, and then everyone will move on to the next ‘festivity’: New Years. And the festivity after that: Valentine’s Day. And the festivity after that: Easter Weekend. And, and, and – I think you know where I’m going with this.

I do believe that my liking for Christmas music is something which is deeply inbred – an important factor embedded within my genes, and most definitely finding its root in my mother’s side of the genetic pool that makes up a living, breathing human individual (although I must wonder at times whether all men can be said to be human, but let’s leave that out of this). My mother absolutely loves Christmas music. Plus she’s active with the school choir, teaching them songs to perform, so in that scenario she gets another dose of Christmas music, as the choir has to perform at the prize giving (amongst other occasions) at the end of the school year. Oh, and of course, since my younger sister is in the South African Youth Choir, we usually (*cough* have to *cough*) attend their Christmas performance at the end of the year. Put together, that’s a lot of Christmas music going around – and by the end of it, I cannot say that I feel exceptionally cheerful.

Anyway, putting my ramblings aside, it’s no wonder that come December, I am significantly in the mood to crank out some Christmas tunes from my laptop and have a merry old sing along, a real gay ol’ time. But still… what is up with some of those lyrics?? Honestly. I can understand songs about Christ and Mary and all that hoohah, yet I’ve always been slightly puzzled by the more ‘child friendly’ songs – or should I rather say, songs that appeal to children. Okay, so Rudolph has a red nose. He was an outcast, he was teased, but he rose above it, and Santa chose him for an exceptionally special job. Great moral to that little story, blah blah et cetera. But what really gets my goat, is a song like “Mrs Santa Clause”. Have you listened to the lyrics? Really listened? The song states that she basically does everything!! And who gets the credit? Santa, of course. Just like those poor little elves work hard (metaphorically speaking, since there is no Santa Clause, but stay with me on this) and all the little kiddies love Santa because he delivered the toys. Okay, so he delivered them. Did he work hard to make them? Did he really put any thought into what he’s giving the kiddies in story books and films and cartoon shows? I think not.

But I’m rambling again. Not that that’s anything new… Also: Rudolph, Frosty, Santa, and I’ll bet you even that happy little tree – all of them are male, have you noticed that? And there’s a song “God rest ye merry Gentlemen”. I’m not going to say it’s discrimination, I understand what the songs are about and all, but they say that there should be equality, and that we should go with universal things (although some say we shouldn’t), so right now I’m a bit confused. Not that I’m going to blame my genes on this one. I’ll just blame logic. Or the use of reason, or something to such an extent.

In the meantime, I’m going to make myself a cup of black, bitter coffee and turn on that Fall Out Boy ‘Christmas song’. It is Christmassy, after all… and all my other Christmas music is at home… bah, humbug.




One response

1 01 2010

Hey, ok, I get it, I guess – but does this really work?

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