Thinking my happy thoughts…

29 06 2012

…and trying not to contemplate murder.

Hint: it hasn’t really been working. And I apologize in advance for the ‘rant’.

There’s something people need to understand: if you mess with my cat, even in the smallest way, you most definitely mess with me. Thus far I’ve been controlling my emotions (and immense desire to retaliate) quite well, but I don’t know how much longer I can stand it.

*breathe* Okay, here’s the story:

Last Friday, I arrived home to find a letter from the complex’s representative stating that (1) it had been brought to their attention that there are animals in the complex; (2) it is in actual fact a pet-free complex, (3) we need to indicate who gave us permission to have our pets, providing written proof of this; (4) pets should be neutered/spayed; et cetera. This immediately put me in a foul mood since we received a notice last year February that only the three apartments listed therein had permission to own cats (thank the Gods for my obsessive-compulsive hoarding instinct that kicked in and made me keep that notice!)

If they’re going to complain about the cats (and there aren’t that many anymore, though now there are two dogs), I want to provide a counter argument complaint about the g*ddamn kiddies that live here:

(1) They run around everywhere; (2) they scream at each other while standing side by side, and it sounds like they are being murdered – I’m not sure whether to be concerned about a true injury or annoyed about the obvious attention-seeking gesture; (3) they have a blatant disregard for cars coming in and out of the gate, instead deciding that that’s a good place to hang around and then getting petulant/sulky when you ask them to move; (4) they don’t seem to have been taught that you leave other people’s pets alone and shouldn’t agitate/chase/pick them up or take them into your apartment – why do you think they run away or, in a different scenario, scratch you for grabbing at them. Sometimes animals cannot help what they do, but you as a parent are raising that child and obviously not doing the best of jobs… Trust me, I could go on and on about the little hooligans.

And I now, again*, have good reason to.

[*I say again because while we were on honeymoon they managed to let the cat out of our apartment and have my older sister in a flat spin looking for Smudgy only to hear one of the apartment doors opening and seeing her running from that direction.]

While I was reading the letter on Friday, Smudgy came to sit on the countertop. I immediately noticed that she wasn’t her usual self: she didn’t meow at me, wasn’t curious about what I was eating, wouldn’t respond when I talked to her and instead just sat there looking frightened/alert while staring at the window. I noticed that her tail was a droopy, and initially assumed she was merely feeling a bit ‘off’… until I told my mum about it on the phone a few minutes later. Her opinion? That Smudgy’s tail might be broken.

Cue mild panic attack and protective anxiety over my beloved kitty!

I could see she was in a great deal of pain, struggling to sit/lie down comfortably and sort of holding her backside in the air. Upon taking her to the vet, it was confirmed that her tail was either broken or dislocated, they he suspected (and I hoped for) the latter. I had to leave her there overnight so that she could go for x-rays the following morning. It turned out that her tail had been dislocated, but that she would be fine as long as there were no internal problems (nerve endings not working properly being the main concern). I had to closely monitor Smudgy’s sandbox habits – not being able to urinate or pass stool could mean complications and a possible operation. Defensive human mommy that I am, I worked from home on Monday just so that I could be close to her.

It seems like Smudgy was pursued by someone/something and, when she jumped into our window to escape, digging her nails in for purchase to drag herself out of harm’s way, aforementioned someone/something yanked on her tail – thus causing the dislocation. I don’t believe another cat could have done it. If it were a car, Smudgy’s tail would have been broken, not dislocated, and she knows to stay away from moving vehicles (she makes herself scarce when one starts up). The only logical thing that springs to mind is that the kiddies were (again) running up and down the stairs, playing in front of the various apartments, and then were chasing her and trying to grab onto her when she jumped inside. The school holidays started last Friday, after all, and I’ve seen them harassing cats before…

Oh, and when we were finally able to let Smudgy outside again on Tuesday, she was only gone for a short while before she leapt with great swiftness through the window again. A few seconds later, I heard the children passing by our window and running down the stairs to their respective homes, deterring me from seeing whose delinquents had been after her.

*rage rage RAGE*

Anyway: Smudgy’s tail is still a bit droopy, but other than that, the vet has confirmed that she’s fine and should make a speedy recovery. I just wish that she didn’t have to go through that pain 😦 I’ve tried not thinking about it too much. Instead, I’ve been thankful that the damage didn’t necessitate surgery and that she’s been giving me more cuddle time and affection.

Perhaps I should take up a personal mantra: Keep calm and don’t kill the kiddies… yet.

Stretching out across my lap before coming in for a cuddle

Completely contented kitty 🙂

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I’m freeeeeeee

15 03 2012

Blog readers!

I’ve missed yooouuu!!!

This whole year has been crazy-busy for me. I’ve been working a lot of overtime, weekends ceased to exist for a period of what seemed like endless time, many a disappointment and frustration abounded, and yet I am still here – happy that it’s nearly over… if only for a while.

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To ‘celebrate’ the fact that the last three of the books I was working on were burnt on disc at 21:30 last Friday (talk about a long day at the office… and great hunger on my part, with no food or monies), I spent the weekend reading… Oh, and dealing with a HUGE headache that bordered on the verges of migraine land. Monday evening, my amazing friend Mr Awesplendmarkable – thus named because he’s awesome, splendid & remarkable – sent me his latest novel 🙂 To make it more exciting (I was already in great anticipation about it), he made Smudgy & myself joint-dedicatees, along with one of his other friends and her kitty companion. If that isn’t cool, then I don’t know what is!! [I was able to finish the book in a day, even with sleeping and going to work and all the little things that go with it.]

Last night I was baking up a storm because I was commissioned to do so. Since I’m the office ‘bakester’ (or should that be bake-STAR, amirite??), I was the obvious choice for providing goodies for one of our colleagues’ last day in office before she moves on to better, brighter things. I was never told what to bake, and ‘cake’ is open to interpretation… so I baked chocolate cake, cheesecake, cupcakes plus some carrot muffins and cookies. I left work angry – so much so that I started crying when I got into the car – so baking was therapeutic.

Probably because I was very seriously contemplating whether I could get away with inflicting irreversible, epicly-proportioned harm on certain individuals.

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But that’s all right. It’s over now. I’m free. Today is my last day in office, then I’ll be on leave until (and including) the 26th. The next almost-two-full-weeks is going to be great. Sleeping, reading… reading… more reading… I think you get what I’m driving at 🙂 And even if I get bored, I’d much rather be bored at home than bored or super-busy at work. [Repeat after me: “I need a vacation!”]

Now I just have to hope that the Department of Basic Education approves these books. Otherwise I don’t want this job anymore. To quote someone or other: “F*ck this shit!”





I’m too busy thinking of… other things… to come up with a better title

10 01 2012

My dearest blog readers!

I trust that most of you are back at work already (if you’re not, enjoy it while it lasts…)

I started working again last Thursday (I’ll admit that I checked & responded to e-mails a few days in advance, obsessive-compulsive and all that), and so far, things are… well… crazy. That’s as good a word as any.

I’m not entirely sure if that’s crazy in a good or bad way, sometimes it’s actually both, but it is kuh-raaaaay-zee nonetheless.

As ever, I have many figurative face-palm moments when dealing with people who come across as incompetent, stupid, petulant… the list goes on and on. You try staying all helpful and happy while explaining to someone how to find and apply styles in Word, saying the same things over and over and over again – perhaps there is something to that old saying that patience is a virtue!!

It’s all right, though. I manage to stay very calm during the day, addressing problems as they arise (the ‘joys’ *cough* of Project Management) and working for (more than) my money’s worth. Then I get home after a long day and prepare supper – some ‘quiet time’ while my Significant Other is busy working… a good time for contemplation…

Those 50s housewives had the right idea

Yip, nothing nicer than taking your aggression out on whatever you’re busy whisking/ stirring/ whatever and finding your centre as you think about the things you’d like to say to other people (or, yes, the murder you want to commit – we’re all mad here…) A kitchen is as good a place for thoughts of malice as any, don’t you think? I’ll start brewing a storm in a teacup and see where things go from there…

So if you see me on an extremely crazy-busy day, and I’m calm & ‘relaxed’ & smiling (vacant, borderline-psychotic expression optional), you know what I’ll be thinking of that night!

[That’s probably also why I enjoy baking and have taken many treats to the office – a sort of, “here you go, enjoy, I imagined your face as I was beating those g*ddamn eggs into what could possibly be termed a stupor”, the grin never leaving my face… If I ever take the time to bake you some treats, you’ll have to decide what my intentions were for yourself.]





Mood modification

4 11 2011

So the last few days my disposition has been quite on the negative (read: very angry) side. This has left me feeling a bit drained, moody, listless in the evenings, and put off when it comes to the intake of sustenance (i.e. food).

Since nobody likes a grumble buns, I’m going to get rid of this face:

…by doing the following (or at least try my very best to):

…and then attempt to feel/ look like this today:

At the moment – note the time, 10:10 in the AM – things are going rather well… Although I’m going to have to be pretty careful and watch myself, since I noted (to my despair) that I have a meeting with my manager until 5PM.

Greek Gods, this is going to be a loooong Fried-day…

So blog readers: what do YOU suggest I should do to get into a better mood?

[PS: One thing that can definitely raise my spirits is the fact that the new Stephen King novel is being released next Tuesday!!!!]





Bee with an itch

3 11 2011

I’m still in a foul mood, though for other reasons than yesterday… or was it the day before that? No, wait, it was on Tuesday (though I wouldn’t put it past this odious state to carry through until the weekend).

Whatever the case may be, it’s Meh-day, so perhaps my disposition is merely keeping pace.

Before I came to work this morning, I noticed that a friend of mine (a witty/ funny/ sarcastic, i.e. swell, guy) tweeted the following:

“So November 3rd is both Housewife Day and International Sandwich Day. Coincidence? I think n– *is stabbed by the closest woman*”

This immediately made me think of the following picture:

To keep the proverbial good times rolling (sarcastic face), I’ve decided to share my mood with you visually. Hope you enjoy the pictures below and have an amazing splendid good moderately okay bearable Meh-day.

[PS: My older sister, Libby, says that we must be having a psychic connection or something this week, since my mood mirrors hers. Perhaps it is genetic!]

[PPS: Betty Bright brought me a budvase brimming with lavender this morning. So far it hasn’t calmed me, though I am in a state of tranquil, composed antagonism.]





Anger Management

2 11 2011

What do people mean with ‘anger management’, anyway?

Is it about getting yourself to calm down; finding a sort of inner peace with the world and centring your chi; learning to accept that everyone gets angry but not allowing it to get the better of you?

Screw that.

I don’t want to manage my anger (it’s enough that I’m a Project Manager at work!)

I want to harness that anger, to let it stew and mould it and then tap into it when the time is right and use it as a driving force in my day-to-day life. Instead of getting an irate outburst, I want to use all my frustration and ‘hatred’ to fuel my productiveness. Sometimes the best work is done when you’re angry/ brooding…

Okay, so perhaps the above sounds like managing my anger, since I don’t let it get the better of me and cause me to make a scene. But that doesn’t mean that I’m not angry. I’ll just be channelling the anger into a more dynamic state.

I don’t get angry often. It takes a lot to get me angry/ frustrated to the point that I start ‘scaring’ people – to the point, in fact, that I post a short ranting status on Facebook, using stars to replace letters in offensive words. After all, I’m supposed to be sophisticated and proper, daaahling 😉

But perhaps we’ve all got it wrong. Perhaps ‘anger management’ isn’t about managing your anger – it’s about managing to get angry! Some people never seem to get angry, almost as if they are emotionless, so in that sense, the fact that you as an individual actually have the capacity to get angry makes you more normal, more human (if there is such a thing)… Am I making sense? Who cares; it’s Whensday/ Hump-Day, and I’m so tired that I simply cannot wait for the working week to be over.

One thing about me being incredibly angry: I tend to want to tell people how I feel about them and their behaviour (cue many ‘Oh snap’ moments), though I never do. I just get a sort of sick satisfaction thinking the things that won’t pass my lips. Some people deserve to be brought down to earth and given a proverbial b*tch-slap, yet it’s not my place to do so (no matter how tempting it is).

If I’m still angry/ get angry again by the time I go home tonight, I’ll just have to start obsessively cleaning *laugh* Though I’ll try being faux positive today. It’s the best you’re going to get out of me.

So, how do YOU deal with anger?

[NOTE: the way I deal with anger is not limited to the blog entry above… though this is how I felt after my utterly crappy, infuriatingly vexing, rage-filled Tuesday.]





Keep calm…

13 10 2011

It’s Meh-day again, everyone!

And you all know what that means: it’s one day closer to Friday (Fried-day) and the weekend – happiness all around 🙂

So amid the stress, frustration, slight panic and lacklustre wanting-to-give-up feelings you might (read: probably will) be dealing with today at work/ home/ school/ where ever, let’s all just try to keep calm and make the best of it.

Here are a few ‘Keep Calm’ posters (I grouped everything together into one image) to brighten up your day… and bring in a bit of humour/ silliness!!