Message Sessions III

27 03 2012

Dear Department of Home Affairs

You better send me my new ID soon. The fact that you misprinted my ID and never let me know about it doesn’t put you in my good books… not to mention the inconvenience of having to fill in the forms again and getting that annoying black ink all over my fingers for prints. You better not mess up again, or there’ll be hell to pay. Why can’t you just get your sh*t together?!

Fed up,

A hard-working tax payer (likely helping to pay your salary!)

– – –

Dear movie people who determined the release dates of films

I read THE HUNGER GAMES trilogy at the beginning of last year and have been eagerly anticipating the release of the first film since then. However, for some or other reason, it only starts showing in South Africa on the 13th of April!! Now I have to try and avoid reading people’s tweets, reviews, memes et cetera for the next two and a half weeks. I don’t know why the release dates for films as greatly anticipated as this one need to differ from country to country (read: for us not living in the US), but just know that you have really ticked me off. And then you wonder why so many people download pirated versions of films…

Disdainfully,

An annoyed filmgoer

– – –

Dear writers of dystopian novels

I love you. There’s no better way of putting it.

Warm regards,

An avid reader

– – –

Dear work/job

Thanks for not accumulating while I was away for the last week and a half. It’s nice to think that all the e-mails I came back to this morning were only general updates/admin and the like. Now if only we could arrange for a salary increase with the new contract I received this morning… I don’t particularly want to be jobless from the 1st of April, but I also feel all the hard work I put in is worth more than I’m getting. Don’t worry – I’m sure we’ll work something out. I think I’ll go crazy if I have to sit at home, unemployed, with nothing to do with my time… unless I start a little home bakery… or the whole book review blog idea picks up.

Gratefully,

Obsessive-compulsive workaholic

– – –

Dear Significant Other

Thanks for the few ‘lunch dates’ while I was on leave, for helping me download books to read, for making me laugh when I felt bored/depressed/listless, for watching CONAN THE ADVENTURER with me (and enjoying it!)… and for just being you. Oh, and for reinstalling/fixing my laptop – you always know best *haha*

Oodles of love,

Me xxx

– – –

Dear Mr Awesplendmarkable

Thank you sooo much for sending me your latest novel a while ago – I read it in a day and LOVED it (I’ve told you that already but it’s worth repeating). If I were a publisher, I’d definitely snatch you up! Thanks also for being such a great friend and for letting me be one of the first people to immerse myself in (and comment on) your works of fiction. It’s much more fun than schools publishing. You ROCK!!

Signed

Your biggest fan… 😉

– – –

Dear life

Get yourself on track. I know I’ve been joking about having a mid-twenties crisis, what with the boredom and listlessness I endured while on leave, but that was probably to be expected after working hard for an extended period of time and then finding myself with no obligations and nothing to do. Let’s think about what we want to achieve in the year to come and take better care of ourselves (i.e. let the exercise regime & development of new interests begin!)

Tough love,

Yourself

– – –

Dear narcissistic people

You may think you’re amazing now; you may get away with being rude and obnoxious all the time, throw tantrums to get want you want, and only contact others when you want something… This, however, will not always be the case. Just know: your day will come. That whole “do unto others” saying has been around for ages, and it holds a lot of truth. I am not someone who gets angry often, but I am really close to giving one or two people a piece of my mind. Your distorted view on the world (and everyone who isn’t as marvellous as you believe yourself to be) is going to come back to punch you hard in the face someday…

Definitely not sincerely yours,

Unimpressed & edgy

– – –

Dear coffee

Stop smelling so good. I just might give up all restraint and fall back into your aromatic (proverbial) arms… which, after 27 java-free months, likely wouldn’t be the best idea.

Tempted,

An ex-coffee drinker

– – –

Dear daily headaches

Stop torturing me! You just seem to be getting increasingly worse, and I deal with it, but we both know this isn’t normal.

Quit it,

Un-amused





Scattered Brainings XV

26 01 2012

* What ever happened to common courtesy? Have we become so consumed in our own lives and problems that we cannot be bothered to even be the slightest bit friendly? We have an open plan office setup at work. At some or other point in the day, you are likely to cross paths with most of the people in your section, like when you go to pick stuff up or make copies at the printer. The least you can do is to give the other person a smile, or at least a nod of acknowledgement when they say ‘hullo’ to you (though saying ‘hullo’ back would be preferable). Many times, this does not happen. I’m not asking you to be the nicest person in the world, but if I say ‘hullo’ to you, would it really kill you to say ‘hullo’ back? I’m now at the point where I’ve given up trying and don’t greet certain people when I see them because I cannot elicit a response from them. Time to bake some murder muffins

* About a week ago, one of my colleagues asked me how I was doing despite – and I quote – “the deer-caught-in-the-headlights look” that can be seen on many a face when referring to the upcoming submissions. Being me, I immediate wondered how this would translate into fashion – what would the key colours, style and accessories be for that definitive deer-caught-in-the-headlights look? What will make you look confused, scared, and ‘cute’ all at the same time? (Confession: I think I may be losing it…)

* Saw this on Facebook and just had to share. As a Scooby-Doo fan, I approve:

* Last week, while dining out, my Significant Other asked me: ‘Where do you see yourself in 5 years?’ This is one of the most annoying/ scary/ shrug-inducing questions ever uttered by man. I had this sudden urge to answer, “About two and a half months away from turning 30”, but decided against it.

* Don’t you just hate it when something silly/ annoying gets stuck in your head for days on end? You have that song playing in your mind when you wake up; it sneaks in every hour or so while you’re busy working; and it might just make another appearance before you go to sleep. Oh, and don’t forget the accompanying imagery! I watched a certain YouTube video that has been ‘harassing’ my mind for perhaps over a week now. I have four words for you: “Every day I’m shuffling”

* I’m a bit worried (already) that I won’t reach the goal I set myself for my 2012 Reading Challenge on Goodreads. Last year I was able to read 145 books (yes I did!), with my initial goal being 100.  This year, I’ve decided to set the bar at 100 again, and then see how it goes. I was off to a bad start since it took me nearly two weeks to get through one book – not because I’m a slow reader, but simply because it failed to fully capture my attention. Luckily I’ve been able to pick up the pace and am ‘on track’, according to Goodreads… yet things are going to be super busy until mid-March here at work. I’ll just have to catch up…

* Paper cuts. (Enough said?) I am the self-proclaimed queen of paper cuts. It’s not that I get a paper cut every day or anything like that (although, yes, there are often days when they appear out of thin air and leave me exasperated as to their precise origin). It’s just how things turn out when I do get one. When I get a paper cut, it has to be exceptional. Take Tuesday, for example. Three paper cuts… on the same finger… at the Exact. Same. Time. (!!!)

* Yesterday morning on our way to work, I told my Significant Other that I’m not meant/ cut out for writing. (Haters gonna’ hate?) I just feel disconnected from my writing. Stephen King says that if you have any hope of becoming a successful writer, you should read a lot and write a lot. I’ve got the reading part down pat, yet I am lacking in the writing part. I have been consumed by the schools sector of the written word… I still enjoy reading other people’s manuscripts (not only at work, though it is part of my job – I’m talking about actual ‘real-world’ novel writers) and doing some editing/ providing feedback… but that makes me feel… I don’t know… like a hypocrite? They say those who can, do, and those who can’t, teach… or edit. Which has always bugged me. Because if you yourself cannot write, how can you teach someone else to do it and tell them what is right/ wrong (or grade them on it, *cough* one of my university lecturers *cough*)? In any case, I think I need a big nudge to get me started on my own writing again.

* Being home alone in the evening makes me want to bake and watch a Disney movie (usually THE PRINCESS AND THE FROG or TANGLED). Why is that? I ended up baking raisin-and-flaked-almond oats bars last night… and watching THE PRINCESS AND THE FROG… again…

Topped off with melted chocolate chips!!

* I say the word ‘um’ a lot… at work… while talking to my line manager. This annoys me. It reminds me of an English lecturer we had at university who would say “and, um…” before/ after Every. Single. Sentence. Not the best way to focus on PARADISE LOST, I can assure you.

* Since I have a pear-shaped figure, does that mean I should only eat pears? Or can eating a different fruit help change my shape? *Ponder* I’ve heard of people who are pear or apple shaped, but not a word about any other fruit. If you were banana shaped, would you be bent? Are small, plump/ round people grapes? And what about really large people – are they watermelons? I’m thinking about this too much!!





Some Christmas blog entries

19 12 2011

Well hullo, dearest blog readers!

I hope that you’ve all got your bells jingling and the halls decked, because there are only 5 more ‘sleeps’ until we hit Christmas Eve!

Many people are already on holiday (lucky them), but if you’re like me and still working until the last (which, for me, is Friday), then you don’t have to feel ‘ashamed’ if you haven’t been experiencing the feel-good spirit that the festive season is supposed to evoke. It still doesn’t feel like Christmas is around the corner. All I can think about is work, work, work…

I do have my tree up, though – that should count for something!! 😉

Small but suitable for our apartment

There's even an edible candycane on the tree!

Smudgy's very own stocking

Let's jingle some bells!

Ooh, shiny...

I spent last night baking some Christmas cookies while watching THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS, so I’m sure that counts as getting in to the spirit of things… right? Now all I need to really get me going is to watch my favourite ‘Christmas’ movie: DIE HARD!

I know lots of people search for Christmas-related blog entries around this time, which is why I decided to share a few of my old entries that I thought you’d enjoy. I’ll see if I can find time to be cynical and get my “bah humbug” on before the 25th 😉

Yippee-ki-yay…

FESTIVE RAMBLINGS:

* It’s Christmas time

* Christmas: Fall Out Boy style

* Call me Cookie

* “Oh I’m the happiest Christmas tree…”

* Christmas carols with a twist

* Garfield – the 12 courses of dinner

* Christmas with South Park

* Christmas carols with LOLcats

* The 12 days of Christmas: Pokémon style

* Cartoon Christmas specials I grew up with

* Christmas sing-along with Garfield

* Holiday cheer?